"I feel like I'm in a competition with you...I don't feel like I'm in a competition with Lexie because she's clearly a robot."
-11/5
"I feel like Luka does need rescuing from these pincher-poker people."
-11/5
Re. aggressive anal sex:
"I feel like it would only be polite to offer crack at that point."
-11/5
"...so I think I understand where he was coming from...but he totally ruined that squirrel's life."
-11/5
"He has become the old lady he once mocked."
-11/5
"...No, you would be violating your own civil rights."
-11/5
"I feel like that was a creepy laugh...but there's a hamburger on this cat."
-11/10
"Leaving there I felt like I had just had sex...but without the guilt."
-11/11
"I've got this Chinese box that smells like old people."
-11/11
"Dude, if you're magnetizing the Jamaicans, you know that shit's cute!"
-11/12
A: "Do you remember owning a spur?"
B: "Not since high school."
-11/17
"The world is safe for democracy again...and dogs in cars!"
-11/19
"I didn't say she was gripping it in her vagina walls! (laughter:) Sorry I spit chip on you."
-11/20
"Seems like someone's always talkin' about Rilo Kiley and someone's always defensive."
-11/22
A: "How do you Photoshop coke?!"
-beat-
B: "You can Photoshop coke!"
-11/22
A: "Who brought the Foreman Grill?!"
B: "It's Jim's."
A: "Okay. (beat:) I'm a terrible person."
-11/22
"I'm an anxious yuppie, I realized...I'm still surprised I'm not a Jew."
-11/22
"It's not boring, it's different...you know how I like to make fun of things that are different."
-11/22
"I feel like I need a wheelbarrow for my stomach."
-11/22
"Nobody wants a penis with stuffing in it."
-11/22
"What is the War of 1812?...something I should know?"
-11/22
"Well, you don't get him to love you by walking like Frankenstein!"
-11/22
"I'm just stating the facts. I'm not making a sexist remark...you're the one who was saying you're jealous of a dog lickin' his balls."
-11/22
A: "Is he gay?"
B: "British."
-11/22
"Sorry, you guys, I totally failed. (beat:) I couldn't find my cowbell or my kazoo."
-11/23
"You're like a rowboat made of steel."
-11/24
"All right, I'll meet the goddamn baby!!"
-11/30
"Babymamma drama for real!...but without the baby."
-11/30
Friday, November 30, 2007
November 2007
Labels:
anal sex,
babymamma drama,
cowbell,
gays,
George Foreman,
oldies,
robots,
squirrels,
vagina
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