Friday, October 31, 2008

October 2008

"Navy is really dark."
-10/3

"Hello, remember when we tried to walk home from downtown Long Beach? You barfed on the sidewalk all the way home!"
-10/3

"That's like the time I threw up on the Pakistani fraternity!"
-10/3

"Was it racist in the way of, like, Australians?"
-10/3

Re. astrology:
A: "I'm pretty spot-on with my sign."
B: "I am too! I have a foot fetish with my own feet."
-10/3

A: "You are bossy."
B: (gasp:) "I am so bossy!"
-10/3

A: "I threw up in my rubber boat shoe the last time I had seafood."
B: "You have a rubber boat shoe?!"
-10/3

"It's scary as in (drops voice to a whisper:) gangs!"
-10/3

"I don't think I want a Narnia tattoo."
-10/4

"I have an old-timey collection of seashells."
-10/4

Male Boss A: "Do you ever read Jezebel?"
Male Boss B: "Am I a lady?"
-10/14

An instant messenger chat excerpt:
i love greek food, therefore i love tom hanks
they go hand and hand
-10/16

Boss: "Let's bring back McCarthyism."
-10/22

"Nothing says '37-year-old gay man' like the Nissan Altima."
-10/23

An instant messenger chat excerpt:
A: we can allow the word douche right
A: in comments
A: can we approve a coment
A: that sasys "Bill's a douche"
B: no douche!
-10/23

An instant messenger chat excerpt:
i was hiking and ran into some cows
i was kind of scared.
they're pretty big you know
and they were staring at me.
-10/24

A: "So excited about the sea dragons!"
B: "I'm so excited about this 22-year-old girl!"
-10/27

"...but I think he had a stroke. And he's young. (beat:) That made me happy. Real happy."
-10/31

"I suppose if anyone could have vegan flesh it would be Jesus."
-10/31