March 2010

Boss: "Does Kirstie Alley have a lemur?!"
-3/2

Boss: "I have no need to see Johnny Depp play another gay man."
-3/5

Boss: "I'm just going to be the next Archie Bunker."
-3/8

Boss: "Yeah, let's not yuck each other's yums."
-3/9

Boss: "If I have a dog with cancer I'm namin' it TypePad."
-3/11

Coworker: "You're more of a tough-love guy."
Boss: "I'm more of a no-love guy."
-3/11

"Weren't your pectoral muscles brought up in conversation once?"
-3/13

Re. Miss Piggy:
"She looks like Sharon Stone in Casino."
-3/13

"You know what it is? I like really gay things, that's why I like Annie."
-3/13

Boss: "Stop pouring bitterness into your eyes and looking at me."
-3/26

Boss: "Oh, I bought my Taylor Swift tickets!"
-3/26

"It's all fun and games until she pukes in your bed."
-3/26

"My diet's been, like, drinkin' and fuckin'."
-3/28

Coworker: "I don't care what the story is! Get a camel in the photo spot now!"
-3/30

Boss: "I think I'm grooming my succulent!"
-3/30

Boss, crisply: "He looks very much like a lawyer. Is that what he is?"
-3/30

Boss: "Last night I forgot to take the 14mg patch off and I had crazy dreams about a post-apocalyptic world."
-3/31

Boss to people gathered in his office for a meeting: "I didn't call this meeting, did I?"
-3/31

"There's clapping. Does that mean there's cake?"
-3/31

Boss: "We had this really great story about that! Oh wait, I read that in another magazine."
-3/31

Boss, re. a restaurant he checked into on Foursquare: "And you know that place ain't known for its good food. (beat:) And I'm the mayor of it."
-3/31